[After that brief encounter, Castiel doesn't let it surface in his mind all that often. He knows he saw something he wasn't necessarily meant to see, and as far as he's aware there's no way back.
That's how he handles it at first, at least. He realizes he should feel ashamed that he only starts seriously considering how to get to Gabriel when he needs his brother's help, but that's because things have finally become that dire.
He's in over his head, and he knows that. To think that there was a time when all he did was follow orders and carry out tasks. Now he's taking on all of Heaven for the sake of ideals that he learned from humans, and he can't say he regrets it despite how far he's fallen. But Castiel realizes that he's facing an archangel, and as much power as he's gained recently, he isn't at that level.
Michael and Lucifer are obviously out of the question, so that only leaves Gabriel. And it's not something Castiel would have even thought about had it not been for that one, small moment when they'd exchanged words in that place beyond death.
He realizes that the very idea of trying to bring an angel back to life is ludicrous, but Castiel also realizes that he's proof of its possibility. He knows that he's no God, but he's crossed over between life and death enough times that he might just be able to replicate it.
The idea he comes up with is a reckless one, and he can only imagine the words others would say to warn him away from it. Of course, Dean's voice is always the one that rings loudest through his head: What are you, crazy? That whole dying for siblings gig is overrated, believe me. But if this goes right, both of them will be coming back. That's what gives him the conviction to go through with it.
Castiel's scoped out a warehouse that's completely abandoned, one with blacked out windows, as the spot to perform the ritual. He's studied the symbols over and over, knows where to carve and where to slice and where to stab. Slowly but surely, he goes through the painstaking process of cutting into his vessel, ignoring the way that his Grace shines through with each slice of the blade. Even as he's draining his own essence, he's also tying his Grace down, so he'll have a body to return to.
Once all of the preparations are made and his vessel is just about at its limit, Castiel raises his blade and plunges it deep into his chest, through his heart. Which is how he goes tumbling into that great beyond for the third time.]
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That's how he handles it at first, at least. He realizes he should feel ashamed that he only starts seriously considering how to get to Gabriel when he needs his brother's help, but that's because things have finally become that dire.
He's in over his head, and he knows that. To think that there was a time when all he did was follow orders and carry out tasks. Now he's taking on all of Heaven for the sake of ideals that he learned from humans, and he can't say he regrets it despite how far he's fallen. But Castiel realizes that he's facing an archangel, and as much power as he's gained recently, he isn't at that level.
Michael and Lucifer are obviously out of the question, so that only leaves Gabriel. And it's not something Castiel would have even thought about had it not been for that one, small moment when they'd exchanged words in that place beyond death.
He realizes that the very idea of trying to bring an angel back to life is ludicrous, but Castiel also realizes that he's proof of its possibility. He knows that he's no God, but he's crossed over between life and death enough times that he might just be able to replicate it.
The idea he comes up with is a reckless one, and he can only imagine the words others would say to warn him away from it. Of course, Dean's voice is always the one that rings loudest through his head: What are you, crazy? That whole dying for siblings gig is overrated, believe me. But if this goes right, both of them will be coming back. That's what gives him the conviction to go through with it.
Castiel's scoped out a warehouse that's completely abandoned, one with blacked out windows, as the spot to perform the ritual. He's studied the symbols over and over, knows where to carve and where to slice and where to stab. Slowly but surely, he goes through the painstaking process of cutting into his vessel, ignoring the way that his Grace shines through with each slice of the blade. Even as he's draining his own essence, he's also tying his Grace down, so he'll have a body to return to.
Once all of the preparations are made and his vessel is just about at its limit, Castiel raises his blade and plunges it deep into his chest, through his heart. Which is how he goes tumbling into that great beyond for the third time.]