[ it's not a perfect situation, and Bucky's sure it never will be, but being able to provide a little input when he can helps so that he doesn't feel completely useless. he can sometimes recall mapping out battle plans and strategies, back during the war, and he was still a thoroughly trained tactitian despite the unsavory organization he'd developed the skill with. as long as he could help a little, provide ideas and help ensure a safe return, then he doesn't start continuously doubting his self-worth. that's just sometimes, now.
but he's long since stopped arguing about going out there with them. he knows better now and he keeps his mouth shut, unless it's to tell Steve to be careful or one of his teammates to keep an eye on him (because he's been known for stupid, reckless behaviour,) and he's pretty sure they can all tell he wants to go with them. but one incident is enough and it's still fresh in everyone's minds, and he doubts he's ever going to really have everyone's trust after all that. better to apologize for punching a hole in Steve's walls than to try and make amends after--
well, better not to think about it. Steve makes it back home, however long it takes him and in whatever condition, but he makes it back. they talk, Bucky gets filled in on all that happened, then he can sleep a little more peacefully at night. all things considered, it's more than he could've ever expected, once his memories started coming back and he realized all of HYDRA's lies. ]
It was her idea. [ ... mostly. Bucky had mentioned something about couch cushions and it developed from there. honestly he's both impressed with how it turned out, and disappointed it's not bigger. but he has to give Natasha credit for knowing how to get the supports just right.
he steps into the kitchen, helps with a few of the groceries - though really he's mostly just picking out pancake ingredients to set out on the counter. he likes to feel helpful, but he's also hungry. ]
Then you need to do more shopping. [ he leans against the counter once everything's set out, watching Steve as he gets started. he likes to help with cooking too, when he can, and at least he's not snapping wooden spoons in half anymore. ] Or do more laundry.
no subject
but he's long since stopped arguing about going out there with them. he knows better now and he keeps his mouth shut, unless it's to tell Steve to be careful or one of his teammates to keep an eye on him (because he's been known for stupid, reckless behaviour,) and he's pretty sure they can all tell he wants to go with them. but one incident is enough and it's still fresh in everyone's minds, and he doubts he's ever going to really have everyone's trust after all that. better to apologize for punching a hole in Steve's walls than to try and make amends after--
well, better not to think about it. Steve makes it back home, however long it takes him and in whatever condition, but he makes it back. they talk, Bucky gets filled in on all that happened, then he can sleep a little more peacefully at night. all things considered, it's more than he could've ever expected, once his memories started coming back and he realized all of HYDRA's lies. ]
It was her idea. [ ... mostly. Bucky had mentioned something about couch cushions and it developed from there. honestly he's both impressed with how it turned out, and disappointed it's not bigger. but he has to give Natasha credit for knowing how to get the supports just right.
he steps into the kitchen, helps with a few of the groceries - though really he's mostly just picking out pancake ingredients to set out on the counter. he likes to feel helpful, but he's also hungry. ]
Then you need to do more shopping. [ he leans against the counter once everything's set out, watching Steve as he gets started. he likes to help with cooking too, when he can, and at least he's not snapping wooden spoons in half anymore. ] Or do more laundry.